First Job

Carter got his first job today.

We were shopping at a store that I shop at once a month. It is like a big rummage sale, where everything costs 25 cents. Normally he goes and plays with all the toys, makes some friends, and has a great time. 

Today, however, he asked if he could buy something with his own money. We agreed that he could buy 4 items, spending $1.10 after tax. He quickly found his items and ran to the cash register. I told him that he had to wait for me to finish shopping. Meanwhile, he found more things he wanted. 

The clerk, Tasha, noticed that his pile near the register was growing larger and larger. She offered him some "quarters" to cover his accumulated items if he helped her clean up. He cleaned with her for about 20 minutes. First, she had him gather all the hangars from the floor. Then, she had him grab the clothes that she raked into piles and throw them back onto the tables (yes, it is THAT kind of rummage sale). After that, he helped her pick up toys and put them into the wire racks. Lastly, she had him sort the broken toys and throw them into a garbage bag with her.

At one point, he recruited a girl who was playing on the floor to work under him. He did not pay her. 

Tasha basically agreed to give him his entire pile for free. I took out a couple things that we didn't really need (Like a 2T shirt and some 18 month shorts that had his favorite character on them), but let him keep the empty Lightning McQueen cardboard box and the broken/missing pieces Nerf shooter gun. He had 13 items at the end, which meant he earned $3.56. 

I hope he he gets a taste for what hard work will get you.

Falling Fish

A fish fell from the sky Sunday. I guess that is what happens when you live 1000 feet from the lake. It was crazy!

Sorry, the pictures are kind of graphic. I wish I could have done something to save him, but there was no way I could run him all the way down to the lake after he'd been out for so long. He was a goner when that bird picked him up.

Girly Things

So, it seems that I will be moving these pictures out of my "To be sold on Craigslist" folder, and putting them into a different folder. 

We had our ultrasound, but I felt it was inconclusive. The umbilical cord was in the way the entire time. The tech swore she saw "Three Lines". However, I did not see what she was talking about, and she couldn't point it out to me. 

I begged the doctor at my last visit to do a quick ultrasound with their portable machine. He felt sorry for me because he was running an hour late, and I had been waiting with both boys, and so he agreed. However, I could see that he was very hesitant. 

We looked up baby's back and saw right through the legs to the umbilical cord. I saw nothing between me and the cord. I am okay calling it at this point.

We're having a girl.

There is always that room for error, but I can breathe a huge sigh of relief now - at least feeling more confident.

And her in-utero name:

Agnes

Sadly, she will not be able to use this cute girly bedding for quite a while, as Beckett is still using the crib. He is a far cry away from using a toddler bed....

Unique

Carter has a spiritual understanding that I can't say I had at this age. He asks questions that I don't even think to ask as an adult. It is constantly boggling my mind. Here are a couple examples of the light inside of him shining brightly.

He loves to make up stories. It is how kids project their understanding really. I will tell Carter something, and he will repeat what I have told him back to me from the experience of someone that he has made up in his mind. He spends most of his day telling me about these imaginary people. He has a friend "Carl" (also happens to be the name of Daddy's boss). He has a friend "Hayden" and a friend "Travis" (Who, coincidentally, share the names of two of Daddy's students who play sports - who have invited us to their events. Carter has seen both of them at these events, and talks about his friends with the same names NON STOP!). A month or so ago, Carter starts talking about "Hayden" and his "Two Daddies". I have not addressed the issue of same-sex marriage with Carter, and I don't know if 4 is the right age for us. I didn't say anything about the comment, and let him just keep talking. He brought it up again and again. It wasn't until he said something about himself having two daddies that I finally asked him about this concept (I figured they had to come from real people, like all his other characters.). His response blew me away:

"Well, Heavenly Father, and him." (Pointing to David)

Wow. Really? I was astounded that he had incorporated this concept into his world view. We believe that we have a spirit and a body. Your earthly father helps create your body, and your Heavenly Father created your spirit. We call him "Father", not just "God". Carter seems to understand this.

About a month ago, I finished decorating the living room for Easter. David got me 2 lamps for Christmas that I can fill with whatever I want. For Christmas, it was sparkly ornaments. For Valentine's Day, it was red garland with silver hearts. For Easter, it is colorful plastic eggs. I also made a cool strand of  paint samples in the shape of eggs. Thank you Creative Memories. 

As we sat down to lunch, Carter says to me "Mommy, what does the Easter Bunny and eggs have to do with Jesus?" 

What do the Easter Bunny and colored eggs have to do with Jesus. NOTHING. Absolutely NOTHING. There are a great many adults that cannot separate the traditions and the true meaning. I am trying very hard to teach Carter the true meaning, and he seems to be grasping that there IS a difference.

Carter woke up in the middle of the night and went into the bathroom. I awoke to the noise of his door opening. When I didn't hear water running, I became concerned. I got out of bed and went to investigate. He was in the bathroom crying. He was beside himself because of a bad dream. I gave him a big hug and tried to comfort him. I walked him back to his room and talked to him about things we could do to help him get back to sleep. I offered to sing with him, or come up with alternate ideas for dreams. Unfortunately, he was too scared to try any of my ideas. He was still crying as he told me that it was just too scary. Then, as if a light switch had flipped in his brain, he got a huge grin on his face.

"I know Mommy! I'll ask Jesus. He'll take the bad dream away."

He got on his knees, said a prayer of comfort and sleep, rolled over, and went to bed. I was blown away at his faith. He KNEW, without a shadow of a doubt, that Jesus would take away the scariness of going back to sleep if he just asked. What faith!

This last weekend was General Conference. It is Carter's FAVORITE time of year. He has been begging to go to Utah and watch Conference in person. He wants to go to the Conference Center and sit in the same room as a prophet of the Lord. Our plan was to go this April. Especially since it coincided with David's break from school. However, me being 7 months pregnant really messed things up. David won't drive that far and risk me going into labor so far from home. Carter has been asking to watch past Conferences for weeks. We don't do a lot of screen time in our house. Carter might get to watch Blue's Clues or Hard Hat Harry once a week (closer to once a month or less). However, what do you say when your 4 year old wants to watch a prophet of the Lord talk about the power of prayer, or the effectiveness of a positive attitude? He has been watching 3 to 4 hours a day for the last 2 weeks. I just can't think of a good reason to tell him no.

This year, Carter stayed in front of the screen for about 6 and a half hours (there is a 2 hour break in the middle, but he was afraid of missing the next session - so he didn't leave the room) on Sunday alone. He was intent to hear every word.

He wants to be a missionary so bad. He asked me to make him a name tag:

He wears it ALL THE TIME.

His Aunt Caroline is serving in the Kennewick, WA mission (VERY close to us too). His buddy Spencer is currently in the Dallas, TX mission - hoping to be heading to Brazil as soon as his Visa goes through.  A good friend of mine, Sarah, is serving in the Philippines. A boy from preschool has an aunt Rachel who is in Germany right now. Plus, there are a number of missionaries serving from our ward. He is very excited to do what they do.

Behind

I have been absent for quite a while. To be honest it was out of guilt. I have been wanting to work so hard so the second child will not miss out on all that the first child enjoyed. I want each of my children to know that their mother loves them, and that they are special. I want to spend just as much time with Beckett as I did with Carter. I spaced them out so I could do that. Carter could have his independent time while Beckett had his mommy time.

I have filled up my life so much, that I don't feel like I am doing a very good job at that. I joined a MOMS Club when Carter was a baby, and have been the president for 2 and a half years now. I have juggled 3 callings, in addition to being a visiting teacher, at church - jobs that require my time and effort not just on Sunday. I run a co-op preschool program so that I could give Carter a quality education while not being able to afford a private preschool or even a public co-op. I became certified as a Child Passenger Safety Technician, and work many MANY hours to help keep other kids safe - 100% volunteer. I am taking night classes to further my education so I can have something to fall back on if anything were to happen to David. 

All this while keeping up our regular schedule of playgroups, story times, and craft activities with other kids.

I am exhausted.

But all that aside, I have had this guilt hanging over my head that I have not been giving Beckett enough time. I have felt like all the work I did to document Carter's life in pictures and videos is going to contrast so highly when we look back at Beckett's life. Beckett is also not a smiley, happy kid like Carter was. It is so rare that he smiled or giggled, that I didn't have much to photograph. It also didn't help that my hands were so busy with Carter, that I wasn't able to grab the camera to catch those moments with Beckett.

Well, I finally faced the reality. I needed to make that first year book for Beckett. I went back through all my unsorted pictures that I have taken over the last 15 months to pull out those of Beckett. I was surprised to find that I have been pulling my camera out. Even though most of them are head shots, not action shots, they are still there. I actually had MORE good pictures of Beckett in the first year than I had of Carter!!

Could it be that I have a better camera now than in Carter's first year, so more of my pictures turned out? Could it be that I am overcompensating, so I tend to take pictures just because I am forcing myself to take pictures? Or could it be that I am just not that negligent? I'm not sure. Either way, I have a renewed commitment to my blog and my documentation. I am not failing after all!

So, here you go. Here are the best pictures of Beckett over the last year:

Notice that he hasn't really changed in size. He grew a ton in the first 5 months, and then completely leveled out after that. He didn't grow more than 1 lb and 2 inches from 5 months to 13 months.

I have taken so many more - pictures that I love. However, these are the best head shots to show how he has grown. I will try to catch up on our fun activities and milestones as I get more time.

As of right now, he is crawling. He began crawling at a week shy of 11 months - 2 months sooner than Carter. We knew he'd do everything sooner. However, the age that Carter began walking has passed, and Beckett is still finding crawling the faster mode of transportation. I am fine with this! He thinks he can walk, and will stand from my lap and take 2 steps before falling on his face. They aren't really steps, they are more moving his legs while falling, motions. However, just because he isn't walking, does NOT mean he isn't climbing. It seems his goal in life is to climb INTO our fireplace. It is such a gross thing when he has made his way in, and crawled around in the sooty mud!! He also climbs up kid chairs to get things higher up, and attempts to climb above the chair (he hasn't snuck past that, as I don't let him out of my sight any more)

He babbles a lot, and will nod his head in agreement with you, while saying "Uh huh." He says "Daddy", although it holds no meaning. When you try to get him to say "Mommy", he will respond with "Daddy". He thinks that is quite funny. He says "Doggy", and I believe he knows who they are. He says "Ah Duh" for "All Done", and accompanies that with the sign. "Mah" for more, with the sign. "Bah" for "More Banana". He signs "More", "Please", "Thank You", "All Done", "Food", and "Milk".

He will give me a kiss completely unprovoked. When asked for a kiss, he will either try to blow me one, or give me a nice slobbery open-mouthed kiss on the mouth (I guess he only has David as an example for that, so we have reduced our kissing in front of Beckett to cheek kisses until he backs off.).

He is starting to get to be a happy kid. We are glad to have him, and hope that he feels just as much attention when new baby is here.

I'd like to bear my testimony....

In our church, we believe in fasting - where we go without food, as a sacrifice, to show the Lord that we are willing to give up our physical desires for spiritual things. Jesus fasted - the Bible teaches of fasting - and we incorporate it into our worship. The first Sunday of the month has been designated as "Fast Sunday". It helps us to make fasting a part of our life. Little children, people who have health concerns,  and women who are pregnant or nursing are discouraged from fasting. 

On Fast Sunday, our meeting is a little different. Instead of our normal service of prepared talks given by members of the congregation on a pre-selected topic, the time is opened for anyone to come up and share their belief in God and His hand in their life. Sometimes it is a very spiritual meeting for all involved. Sometimes it is humorous. Sometimes it is a little awkward, like when those who share go a little too deep into their situation.

Since I am not able to fast right now, and neither is Carter, I didn't announce to him that it was Fast Sunday. As we are finishing up partaking of the Sacrament, Carter says "I want to go up today and talk." Totally uncharacteristic of Carter. He is very shy in front of groups of people, and still struggles to participate when all the children go up and sing. We have a disabled man in the congregation that tries to be the first one up every Fast Sunday. I explained to Carter that he could go up after that man was finished (I didn't want to make it a race, and have someone tripping over his cane or walker to beat Carter up there.).

I knew this day would come. I knew he would want to get up and share his beliefs with everybody. He is just that kind of kid. However, I figured I would be able to prep him before hand. We would sit down and talk about it. I would ask him what he does believe, and help him form it into something he could feel comfortable saying. I remember going up as a child and getting so nervous, I forgot what to say. I stood there very embarrassed, and it took me a long time to go back. I didn't want that to happen to him.

He was so enthusiastic to go up, there was no time to talk to him about what he was going to say. He went right up, they pulled out the step stool, and he boldly spoke into the microphone:

"I love my Mommy and Daddy."

Then he got down and came back to our pew.

Later in the meeting, he remembered more of what he wanted to say and wanted to go back up. I told him he'd have to remember it for next month.

He had an assignment to give the closing prayer in Primary (the children's meeting) also. This is the first time that he wanted us there. The first time, he saw David and only wanted to sit with him, not give his prayer. The next time, we hid, and he did fine. The third time, he saw me and just wanted me to do it for him. This time, he was very adamant that we not miss it. He saw us both sit down (there was no where to hide this time), and he got up and gave his prayer to the whole audience. It was a great prayer. It wasn't rushed or repetitive. He thought out what he wanted to say that would benefit the other children, and he said it. I am very proud of him.

The last time I taught preschool, Carter said the prayer. After he was finished, another boy yelled out "WOW! You can say the prayer all by yourself?" The other kids usually need a little prompting, which most kids do. Carter NEVER has. He has always considered it interrupting during the prayer, and takes great offense to it.

Such a funny kid!

In depth

At dinner today, Carter asked me about death. Completely random. I had been struggling to get Beckett to eat dinner. I got up to get something to wash him off and discovered that Carter was feeding him (Carter can always get Beckett to eat something that I cannot - it is messy, but effective). He then started shooting off questions.

He wanted to know when we will die. I explained that we don't know. All we can do is take good care of our bodies and do the best we can to be safe. "I am NEVER going to smoke!" He blurted out. Not sure where that came from, but smoking is something we can avoid to take good care of our bodies. 

Then he asked me when he was going to get married. I told him that when he was an adult, he could choose a wife. He needed to choose a lady who would make a good wife for him, and a good mother for his kids. I explained that not every girl would be a good fit for him, he needed to be careful and find someone that would work best. He said he needed a girl who would be a good mom because he wanted a BIG FAMILY - with TEN KIDS! (He has said this before. Although, he waffles between ten and thirteen kids)

Then he asked me again what would happen if we died. I told him that if someone we loves dies, they go to live with Jesus and we wait until we die to be with them again. The goal is to all make it back to Jesus. He got really upset that one of us would die before the rest of us. He wanted to know what would happen if that was the case. 

I told him that if Daddy died, we have two options. One, I remarry and we continue on until we die and see Daddy again. Two, we just keep going without adding someone else to our family and see Daddy again when we die. He said "There is a part that is confusing to me." He wanted to know how we marry when we are dead. I told him we don't find a spouse after we die. "I'm still confused how we marry again. You marry Daddy and then he dies and you marry him again?" Then it occurred to me that I didn't say I would marry someone else, I just said I would marry again! He thought I meant marry Daddy again! 

I straightened that out and asked him which option he thought would be best. He said "I choose a different option." I asked what that was "We trade out the options. And nobody dies." Well, that would be great if we got to choose that. I explained that we can't choose on death, but we can choose how we live. He said that he chooses option one. I asked him why. "I want you to marry someone who will play ball with me, and work, and be fun." 

I asked him if he would want Daddy to remarry if I died. "I don't want to talk about it anymore." Oh, can you tell me why you would want Daddy to marry someone else first? And then can we stop talking about it?" "Sure. I don't know. I want to stop talking about it now. I have a headache." Okay. that is the end of that.

I have no idea what brought this on, or how he could have been so calm, rational, and mature. It will pass, and I'll get my running, jumping, hurricane of a boy back. But it was really nice to be able to sit down and have a conversation with him about adult things. I hope we get to have many more.

Out of the mouths of babes

This morning Carter wakes up early and knocks on our door:

"My room smells like URINAL!" - He hadn't wet the bed, and Beckett hadn't leaked through his diaper. We're not sure what he was smelling

Doc from Cars is apparently a "Doctor 'N Covenants, and a precision racing machine."

Beckett loves to sing. He especially loved that we had Christmas music playing throughout the house all month long. He sings along to the radio and to the hymns at church. Now that I don't have the music playing, he sings it his self. At a playgroup we go to, we sing a song about a Cuckoo Clock. "Tick Tock, Tick Tock. I'm a little Cuckoo Clock. CUCKOO CUCKOO!" It has been 3 weeks since we've been, and I don't know if we even sang it the last time we were there. But, he has been "Tick Tock" ing a lot. He babbles something after that, but it is not words yet.

This is our librarian Miss Robin (not at our library) singing the song. I didn't know she sang this song (she hasn't done it at story time with us...) until I searched for this video.

Sad day for Beckett

Beckett woke up this morning, and decided he was finished with his morning nursing sessions. We were only down to one anyway, since I'm not making much. He woke up, I changed his diaper, and David took him so I could wash my hands. I went back to grab him, and he wouldn't come to me. He buried his head in Daddy's chest instead. I tried tyo take him myself, and he pushed my hand away!! I told him I was going to give him milk, and he still refused to come. He signed milk, but wouldn't come to me. I gave him a cup at breakfast instead. He gladly took it - like he does any other meal. Sad say for Beckett. Probably sadder for me...

Christmas 2013

We FINALLY got our Christmas pictures taken - just in time!! 

We have the new house all decorated and the tree is up - a day after Thanksgiving tradition.

Unfortunately, we don't have a mantle on either of our fireplaces, so we had to improvise.

I found this super cute idea on the internet - thank you internet! 

Houses on both sides of us are being gutted right now. The contractor on the right has let me take WHATEVER I wanted. I got some kitchen cabinet doors. 

David painted the middle of this one, and cleaned it up. He drilled our extra cabinet knobs for stocking holders for me.

My friend Alisha helped me work out the red wording on her Cricut, and her sister helped me stick them on.

David suspended it from the ceiling tonight. 

I really didn't do anything but find the idea. . . 

But, I surround myself with supportive and creative people - that has to count for something right?