In depth

At dinner today, Carter asked me about death. Completely random. I had been struggling to get Beckett to eat dinner. I got up to get something to wash him off and discovered that Carter was feeding him (Carter can always get Beckett to eat something that I cannot - it is messy, but effective). He then started shooting off questions.

He wanted to know when we will die. I explained that we don't know. All we can do is take good care of our bodies and do the best we can to be safe. "I am NEVER going to smoke!" He blurted out. Not sure where that came from, but smoking is something we can avoid to take good care of our bodies. 

Then he asked me when he was going to get married. I told him that when he was an adult, he could choose a wife. He needed to choose a lady who would make a good wife for him, and a good mother for his kids. I explained that not every girl would be a good fit for him, he needed to be careful and find someone that would work best. He said he needed a girl who would be a good mom because he wanted a BIG FAMILY - with TEN KIDS! (He has said this before. Although, he waffles between ten and thirteen kids)

Then he asked me again what would happen if we died. I told him that if someone we loves dies, they go to live with Jesus and we wait until we die to be with them again. The goal is to all make it back to Jesus. He got really upset that one of us would die before the rest of us. He wanted to know what would happen if that was the case. 

I told him that if Daddy died, we have two options. One, I remarry and we continue on until we die and see Daddy again. Two, we just keep going without adding someone else to our family and see Daddy again when we die. He said "There is a part that is confusing to me." He wanted to know how we marry when we are dead. I told him we don't find a spouse after we die. "I'm still confused how we marry again. You marry Daddy and then he dies and you marry him again?" Then it occurred to me that I didn't say I would marry someone else, I just said I would marry again! He thought I meant marry Daddy again! 

I straightened that out and asked him which option he thought would be best. He said "I choose a different option." I asked what that was "We trade out the options. And nobody dies." Well, that would be great if we got to choose that. I explained that we can't choose on death, but we can choose how we live. He said that he chooses option one. I asked him why. "I want you to marry someone who will play ball with me, and work, and be fun." 

I asked him if he would want Daddy to remarry if I died. "I don't want to talk about it anymore." Oh, can you tell me why you would want Daddy to marry someone else first? And then can we stop talking about it?" "Sure. I don't know. I want to stop talking about it now. I have a headache." Okay. that is the end of that.

I have no idea what brought this on, or how he could have been so calm, rational, and mature. It will pass, and I'll get my running, jumping, hurricane of a boy back. But it was really nice to be able to sit down and have a conversation with him about adult things. I hope we get to have many more.

Out of the mouths of babes

This morning Carter wakes up early and knocks on our door:

"My room smells like URINAL!" - He hadn't wet the bed, and Beckett hadn't leaked through his diaper. We're not sure what he was smelling

Doc from Cars is apparently a "Doctor 'N Covenants, and a precision racing machine."

Beckett loves to sing. He especially loved that we had Christmas music playing throughout the house all month long. He sings along to the radio and to the hymns at church. Now that I don't have the music playing, he sings it his self. At a playgroup we go to, we sing a song about a Cuckoo Clock. "Tick Tock, Tick Tock. I'm a little Cuckoo Clock. CUCKOO CUCKOO!" It has been 3 weeks since we've been, and I don't know if we even sang it the last time we were there. But, he has been "Tick Tock" ing a lot. He babbles something after that, but it is not words yet.

This is our librarian Miss Robin (not at our library) singing the song. I didn't know she sang this song (she hasn't done it at story time with us...) until I searched for this video.

Sad day for Beckett

Beckett woke up this morning, and decided he was finished with his morning nursing sessions. We were only down to one anyway, since I'm not making much. He woke up, I changed his diaper, and David took him so I could wash my hands. I went back to grab him, and he wouldn't come to me. He buried his head in Daddy's chest instead. I tried tyo take him myself, and he pushed my hand away!! I told him I was going to give him milk, and he still refused to come. He signed milk, but wouldn't come to me. I gave him a cup at breakfast instead. He gladly took it - like he does any other meal. Sad say for Beckett. Probably sadder for me...