Monday, May 23, 2011

Where is the "Toddler Explosion" setting on my washing machine????

Warning: Graphic Picture ahead. Not for the weak stomach.

I thought blowouts were for infants. WRONG. Carter still has blowouts! This week has been especially hard because he has big boy poops now with corn, oranges, and other miscellaneous chunks in them. The other day as we pulled into the parking lot for playgroup, I smelled it. I took him to the back of my station wagon - thank you David for convincing me that it was the better way to go. I pulled his pants down and smeared it all the way down his leg. Pull out too small outfit from the diaper bag (It had been a while since we had an incident outside of the house apparently - that either means we don't get out much, or I have been EXTREMELY lucky.), give him a quick diaper wipe bath, and off to playgroup we go. Little did I know that the pants now safely wrapped in a plastic bag were filled with poop down the leg. I washed them in the machine and that only hurled poop onto all my clothes. I washed that load 3 times on Third-Degree-Burn water temperature setting just to melt the poop away.

Today, we had another blowout. I thought of my friend Chandra on her first week watching Carter at 3 months old. She texted me to let me know Carter had "pooped all the way up into his head fuzz". This time, it went the opposite way. He pooped all the way down to the bottom of his shoes. I don't know how you poop BOTH your shoes. If that could be classified as a talent - my child is a prodigy!!

David was home and between jobs at the time this happened. He usually only gets 15-30 minutes at home on Monday & Wednesday evenings. However, today he came home early. He had an hour with us. He spent it washing our child. Carter got me all poopie. I changed just to find he had flung poo on my flip flops which, in turn, smeared on my new pants and rubbed on my shirt as I tried to wipe it off. I changed twice. While I was changing, David informed me that pudding contains milk. Seems totally non sequitur right? Then, I remembered that I began feeding Carter pudding, in addition to his meat/vegetable & fruit lunch. He was always still hungry after lunch, and I got the sugar free stuff. I thought I was being a good mommy - introducing a healthy sweet and all. Nope. Carter can't handle milk. Remember our Pumpkin Patch attempt? Which led to Soy Milk? I don't think I ever updated you guys, but the soy milk did the trick. Well, I have poisoned my baby again. This time, I should have known better. He has been so grumpy this week. He says "NO!" to everything, even things he wants. I thought it was a tantrum phase. No, he just feels awful.

I have fun playing in the sun pictures for you guys, but it'll have to wait until Carter feels better before I can get to the computer post them. He hasn't let me do ANYTHING this week!!

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